Psychological Recovery Stages Of Quitting Smoking - Part 3 (Bargaining, Acceptance)

By Phil Conran

Bargaining: Bargaining is the stage where smokers want to postpone the inevitable. You want to do all sorts of good things in return for a little lightening of the load of giving up cigarettes. You may try making deals with yourself like:

"I think I have the worst licked. If I have just one cigarette, I'll get right back on track afterward and I won't do it again."
"I'll quit for a week and then reward myself by smoking only on weekends."
"I'll quit as long as my weight stays down. But if it goes up, I'll have to choose. Better to smoke and not gain weight."

Everyone is tempted to bargain. Realizing that it is a natural part of the process of quitting sometimes helps you to move past it. Laugh it off and have a heart-to-heart talk with the "child" inside you.

But you do need to stay on your toes with bargaining. When you really want a cigarette, that bargain can seem very reasonable. You may want to make a promise with one of your friends or family members that you will talk it over with them before you follow any plan that includes smoking some cigarettes. They may be able to help you see through the bargain that is about to interrupt your campaign.

Acceptance: Acceptance is the stage at which you begin to realize your former smoking lifestyle is over. You are finally resolving your sense of loss or grief. A healthy person who has suffered a loss eventually accepts its reality and goes on living life. Some typical comments of acceptance are:

"I think I'm going to do this. I still don't like it a lot, but I think it will stick. "
"I'd still like to smoke sometimes, but I choose not to."
"I am going to teach myself to like my new nonsmoking lifestyle. I'll do it gradually and positively."

With acceptance, you combine all the stages that came before. You don't deny that quitting is hard, but you do find your mind moving on to other things. You stop being angry, but you remain annoyed that the tobacco companies suckered you into hurting yourself. You don't make a bargain of two weeks of good deeds in exchange for a cigarette, but you do recognize now that cigarettes are no longer a source of satisfaction in your life, and that you need and deserve to find other things that make you feel happy and relaxed.

You can get on with living your newfound, healthier lifestyle. A key to moving through these stages to psychological recovery is your attitude toward them. Look at them as part of the process. Don't be thrown or surprised by them. You may even be able to work up a sense of challenge, expectation, and excitement over what lies ahead for you.

Author Details:
Phil Conran writes for various web sites including information portals such as Simply Top's Free Article Directory, information junkie and the A-Z of.com

Source: The A-Z of Smoking

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